Today, I suddenly decided to visit my blogspot. Out of the blue , they say.
It was a little nostalgic looking back at old posts, going, "wait, i said that?"
Some things have changed, some havent. Age is catching up, as evidenced by failing energy and the inability to stay awake at night. (you know, when you're 14, sleep is for the weak!!)
Some havent, like how I'm still not confident, and how straight I am.
Some stuff have evolved. Like how life makes you choose who you want to be, and perhaps on the outside I look loud and opiniated (which I am), but there is just so much more inside of me that I long to share but have burried deep inside myself. The fact is that everyone is busy, not every one, and most , dont care.
I've learnt to accept ( and still trying at the moment) that I cannot please every single person, even the ones I love the most. To do that would require me bending in multiple directions, and as someone said "how many people do you want to be? X to theis person, Y to another? " . I've struggled with this the most, this pleasing people business. I know, I brand it "the non confrontational method". The reality is , there is a choice one has to make, and one will come to this point at one time or another.
Leaving this here because I've made a decision that may not seem popular and perhaps seems even cold. And the decision is hard...but I know it's gotta be done .
