Am feeling so dead tired at the moment. Nervous system is seriously sucking the life outa me. Not that I don't find it interesting...I do. but the lectures are all so so dense. On top of that, I'm 5 weeks to summatives and I'm not even touching MSK. Still got +- 8 notes in GI and renal just started off very slowly. I 'm NOT thrilled.
Today I officially was relieved of my duties from Hydra House as its first secretary along with another super responsible and enthusiastic friend, Sook Yee. I'm glad that both of us managed to carry out our jobs well (I hope , at least). It was quite a bit of work initially, admittedly. And during the house cup, I had darts to worry about, and it took up a HUGE chunk of my time. I highly doubt I'll be doing it if I were in semester 5. I wish the new committee nothing but the best. But from the looks of it, it should be a good team and a good year ahead for Hydra.
Hospital visit yesterday was...ok I guess. We met a patient with A HOST of problems. Its like whatever we ask he'll have positive "signs" (this pain that pain). but he was 81 years old, and an active sportsmen. When we asked him to bend down and touch his toes (as part of the Physical examination of the spine) , he said "1, 2, 3,4, 5, 6 you all challenge me? " in a joking tone...and bent down ALL THE WAY to touch the ground with ease. LEGS STRAIGHT. we were stunned. Later on when we tried ourselves we were not able to do it, and on top of that, was complaining of pain :P shame on us young people?
At the same time, it was the 2nd time this semester going for hospital visit and having to stand for long hours. I really don't know how I'm to survive clinical school, especially the long hours standing and the early hours waking and late hours sleeping. Beats me. I often wonder how people do it...
And time and again I'm reminded by various things on how little time I have left in IMU BJ. Random friends status updates; the relieving of duties from the house; seeing my semester 1 juniors starting to study and semester 2 and 3 juniors studying hard...Many many things just trigger this thought and I can't help but sink into a basin of pensiveness. At least for a while. How have I done? Have I made a fool of myself? Have I hurt more other's feelings more than I have made another happy?
No one is indispensable, that I know. I don't expect people to remember me once I've left, but if there's one thing I hope I did, I hope I made someone feel that they are loved, no strings attached. I hope I did something that cheered up someone's day. I hope I was never stingy with hugs or time for any other friend. I hope I gave them reason to see why they are beautiful , special ,and one of a kind.
I am falling asleep. As usual , I sleep way before I want to. Today was not so productive. Tomorrow got pbl (research not done yet), and going for a run. That I'm looking forward to somehow.