happy birthday baby

HAPPY BIRTHDAY MR AWESOME


Due to time constraints,this can only be a short post...

HAPPY BIRTHDAY BABY aka Mr AWESOME aka Mr AWW MAN !!! :) :) :)Mr awesome / Mr aww man / my baby sweetheart :)

One year older, one year wiser :D


Coincidentally, this kinda marks our one year together :P

I still remember last year - birthday surprise - newspaper gift - sam garden - first kiss ... ... ...2007 birthday surprise :P

And though this year we're not together physically, I'll always be there in your heart, by your side. :) Always. hehe, sorry for starting your birthday by giving you a BIG scare :P :P :P But sang 'happy birthday' song to you twice, did you like it? :)


You're an amazing guy, friend, listener, encourager, baby... and much more :P I seriously think you're pretty lame at times...but well it comes with the whole package of 'you'...and I kinda asked for it anyway(in my ideal guy,all time favorite column- except I asked for someone "funny" :o)


hehehe, not sure what to write, though our one year,as you said, could have filled many books already. I guess I'll just let memories, let our emotions, and everything to come speak for itself :)


so...

HAPPY BLESSED BIRTHDAY BABY,
you're officially as old as me! muahahahaHappy birthday "cake" - not edible,of course :P

what my bro did, remember I showed you? :P

I love you :)


Dear God, draw this guy whom I love closer to You each day,bless him, enlarge his territory, protect him, guide him always, be with with him and let him stay in Your presence evermore. Thank you God for this love, between him and You, between us, between he and I :)

Deep down

DEEP DEEP DOWN


Deep deep down in my teeny weeny heart, I really really cannot describe what is going on. Can't explain why I close up, even to the people closest to me, the dearests. Can't express how much I feel inside each time I'm reminded of last year, just knowing that I have you to bug each time I'm unhappy, have you to smile at each time I see you, the funny little antiques, drawing of our names on each others hands, the hugs, you. Just you.


Tears are so super duper stubborn, rolling around my eyes, reusing to heed calls to back down. I used to pride myself being ice cold, but I guess I've never been so, and in Eunice's words - You take care of others, but given the chance you rather be taken care of.


I need to mug. I dun wanna be held back, wasting money, wasting time. Hopes and dreams dashed. I need to pull myself together, to tell myself that the dark comes before the dawn, that I musn't lose hope.


And yet, I dun feel I can. Sigh.

mamma mia

MAMMA MIA!!!


I heart mamma mia. such an amazing musical/story. So daring, so crazy, so fun loving.
I'm not sure I would have invited all possible dad's - but I love the end that she gains 3 dad's in the end. My gosh! I had so huge reaction during many of the scenes that I'm glad in wasnt in the cinema, and ,my feet were pattering, I was close to song. I love music :) :) :)


Wall E's not bad either. "Get ready to have some kids!" "define earth. define sea. define dancing"..... Farnie la.


But my personal favourite is still Mamma Mia :) it rawks :) :) :)

REALITY AND NOT

REALITY AND NOT


I'm in med school. Reality.
I'm sinking. Mentality.
I havn't enough time. Fatality?


I have only myself to blame. I dun feel like a med student. Dun even feel like a student :(
Leeettttlllleeee brain of mmmiiiinnneee, won't you rise and shhhhiiiinnnneeee, soak up all the stuff nowwww, I'll give u a break at year end..... :'(

Emo, Eno, Emo

Emo, Eno, Emo


I don't know how to go on anymore. Nothing I've studied so far seems to stick. I feel my head is like an empty coconut shell. :(


I know challenges are inevitables, sometimes even rifts. I just wish it were easier.


I dun noe what to think. Just feeling downrite empty, hollow, emo.


Emo, Eno, Emo :'( :'( :'(

Missing

MISSIN'

Just watching the hustle and bustle around me... the lovebirds, more than that, the "library gangs".... brings back alot of memories so dear , so treasured...


saw 2 "big brothers" taking care of a "lil siz" (a year younger only), trying their best to make her feel better and all. Going out of their way to care. Can't help but feel wistful at the closeness they share, the intimacy, the unconditional love, the care.


I so so miss my dearest friends who used to rough it out with me, the meal times, pinch me even and kutuk and kacau me, lend me a shoulder to lie on when I'm tired (even literally), and the tons of stories we shared, the emotional rides at times, frustration, tears , embarrassment, the growing up... the misunderstandings even. Miss the times of heart to heart talks, the no-barriers, the no formalities. I miss it all.I know change is the only thing constant, but somehow I still find it too hard to come to terms with. :'(

Just Sayin

JUST SAYIN'

Random rattles

When I get married, I want sunflowers instead of roses -sunflowers are big, yellow and bright, and they remind us to always look towards the sun,just like they do!
(popped out last week on a random occasion)

Right now, the biggest desire in my heart is to be able to pass semester two EOS safely, and proceed to semester 3. *heaves a loooooonnnngggg sigh*

Signing out. The notes are beastly :'(

Moody

MOODY

Sitting in the library, blogging instead of studying. A million and one thoughts running through my mind.


I know I need to be more than this. But...


Standing alone, stiffling the hiccups that come between sobs... Even so many people thought I was "emo". How ironic.


Sometimes I wistfully wonder if life could be any different. Super brain, model attitude, happy go lucky, pure and innocent heart. I wish


If I could get tomorrows newspaper today. What would I do. Would I do it to benefit myself, or others. Would I go out of my way for others.


And the bz-ness doesnt help. Plus sickness, terrible cough and runny nose, fatique. Seriously hope its not a reoccuring sickness that was lying dormant.


Hospital visit, saw the extremeties. Birth, sickness, death. Saw the bathing of a deceased old man. Frail, skin and bones. Bodies in mortuary. Accident cases, HIV biohazards, etc. Life ends in a box?


The little babies under UV light, jaundice babies. From outside, saw a caesarian of an expecting mum. The joy later. (and the heartache a child brings along, too). chance to hold a baby, less than 10 hours old. Small, less than 2kg. The amazement, the fragility of a life. Much ahead for that little fellow.


Studies. Struggles. less than a note a day. I don't wanna go on anymore. Sniff. I know nothing is easy. Still. Reclusing seems what I'm doing. Sink into own blackhole.


Miss the warmth, the hugs, the presence. The reassurance, real reassurance that its gonna be ok. Feel so so far away. Miss the smile , the cargo pants, the same-colour-shirt days. Miss the hand running through my hair, the arms around my neck. The times spent. Baking, cooking, hang-kaing. The antiques that can send ripples of giggles , burst of laughter.


Its gonna be just a day right? These feelings are gonna go away right? Keep ploding on, one step, another, and another